Just came across this item this morning:

According to Hollywood North Report, "Marvel Studios' Ant-Man is currently in script development as a major motion picture." According to Hollywood North Report, "Marvel Studios' Ant-Man is currently in script development as a major motion picture."

For those of you who don't remember Garrett Morris playing Ant Man on the great Saturday Night Live "Party with the Super-Heroes" skit from when we were all in grade school, let me fill you in on Ant Man:

• He's Henry Pym, a scientist who discovered "Pym Particles", which make you small. Not microscopically small, but bug small.
• He's a two-time loser in the marriage category. His first wife was killed by Russian spies. The second one was ditzy heiress Janet Van Dyne, who assumed the super-hero identity "The Wasp" (insert Protestant joke here). They got a divorce after he hit her - that's right, he's the first wife-beating super-hero in memory, the only super-hero likely to show up on "Cops".
• When in costume, he's got the proportional strength and powers of an ant. Oooh.
• At a certain point, he got bored being Ant Man, and he decided to switch his super identity. He did it over and over again. After Ant Man, he was Giant Man (he figured out how to grow big, too). Then Goliath (also big, different costume). Then Yellowjacket (small again with some sort of sting). Then he retired. Then he came back - as Giant Man. Then as Goliath. Then as Yellowjacket. Then as Goliath . . .
• His main villain was Egghead, a mean scientist. He was killed in the 80s by Hawkeye, who shot old Eggy with a bow and arrow. A bow and arrow!
• Eventually, when he decided he was no longer interested in being Ant Man, he gave that job over to another guy - an ex-con named Scott Lang, whose ex-wife ran off and left him with a kid. Yup, the character still belongs on "Cops".
• That Ant Man died a month or so back . . . put out of his misery (er, killed) by . . . one of his own troops. That's right. One of the Avengers killed him. Boooo-ring.

Folks, I like super-heroes as much as the next guy. But seriously now. This is getting out of hand.