Saturday, September 08, 2007


Hawaiian Journal - Oh my God, Magnum!

Day 7

Like a lot of people our age, Our Woman in L.A. and I got our first taste of the Hawaiian isles by watching Tom Selleck dispatching bad guys and speeding around in a Ferrari in episodes of MAGNUM, P.I.

Actually, only I got my first taste of Hawaii that way. Our Woman in L.A. is proud to point out that she was too young to watch that show, or was more interested in THE SNORKS during that era. Sigh.

Either way, we couldn't afford to rent a Ferrari to tool around the islands a la Magnum and the boys. But we could afford a helicopter tour of Kauai - which at least is something that T.C., Rick and Higgins would approve of. So early in Day 7, we approached the local HQ of Blue Hawaiian Helicopters, and they took us up in this thing:

We'd never been in a helicopter before, and it pretty much kicked ass. Sure, there was a little bit of nausea as we juked in and out of canyons, dipping and weaving from altitude to altitude. But where else are you going to get views like this one:

Or this one:

When the tour was over, they even gave us a DVD of our journey. It's really fun. We would share it with you, but . . . we really don't know how. I'm pretty sure it involves posting the video to Youtube, and then providing a link here. And, in keeping with the Hawaiian attitude, we're just not in a hurry to do that.

So when it was over, we returned to the hotel with just enough time for a drink, a change of clothes, and then a trip north to the town of Princeville, for dinner at the uber-chi-chi Princeville Resort.

But then . . . it happened. Remember that smell from the Day 6 post? Our Woman in L.A. swore she smelled something in our room? Remember how I told her she was nuts?

Yeah. Never question the nose.

So we're sitting on the balcony with those drinks I mentioned when we both started to smell a neighbor puffing away on a cigar. Our Woman in L.A. swears that it was a very intense cigar. I think it seemed serious and sincere, but questioning the Nose is what got me in this mess.

Calmly - quite calmly, actually - Our Woman in L.A. walked into the room, picked up the phone, and called the front desk. The conversation went like this --

Stephanie: Hi, I just wanted to report that there's a really intense cigar being smoked on our floor. I wanted to ask why.

Desk Jockey: Do you want me to send security?

Stephanie: I don't think it's a matter of security. I just don't understand why someone's smoking on our non-smoking floor.


Stephanie: I mean, this is a non-smoking floor. Correct?

Desk Jockey: Um . . .

Stephanie: Please tell me that you didn't put my husband and I on a smoking floor when we requested non-smoking more than six months. I know that you wouldn't put someone like me with severe allergies close to a bunch of smokers. That just doesn't sound like something the Hyatt would do, or am I wrong, ma'am?

And from there, the apologizing began (along with an offer to take Steph to the local hospital). I heard phrases like, "This is my vacation, so I'm not going to raise my voice, but I do need you to handle this with professionalism and grace." Either way, I think you get the picture.

The outcome? A new room on a non-smoking floor, free breakfasts for the rest of the trip, five free drink coupons, a free bottle of champagne, two free meal vouchers for something other than breakfast, and . . . well, I guess that's about it. We were happy. And so, we headed to Princeville.

The Princeville Resort is pretty ornate and cool. But let's let the pictures do the talking --

Unbelievable meal - and, as you can see, some of the best views on the island. After the meal was through, we stayed out on the terrace and watched the sun set over our dessert. Another perfect day.

Day 8: It starts with a rainbow . . .

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